I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Randomize
