I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
