Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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