TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I will pee on everything he values.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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