He asked me if I "almost moaned"
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
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