The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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