so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
