he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
Sorry my hands just texted you
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
