I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
Randomize