what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
