their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
