I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
