So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize