I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
