I'm gonna have a badass scar
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
