After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Randomize
