i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize