You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
