she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
