How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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