bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
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