Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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