It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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