She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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