Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
home. puking in laundry basket.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize
