i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
Randomize
