Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I party with great urgency now.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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