Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
