Your dad touched me again.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
I tried saying sorry but instead I puked down her shirt and tried to clean it up... Now I have a bruise on my forehead. good news, before she left she wrote her number on my stomach with sharpie
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