It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Randomize
