Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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