Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize