So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Smoked a joint with mom, best Thanksgiving ever!
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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