I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
