dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
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