you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
Randomize
