This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
