Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Randomize