so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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