so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
