coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
Randomize