Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(480): View more from Arizona

I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.

(661): View more from California

Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back

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(512): View more from Texas

the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys

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(707): View more from California

I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER

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(616): View more from Michigan

She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that

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(250): View more from British Columbia

WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him

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