and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
