I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
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