where does the pee come out of this thing
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
