Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
Randomize