Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(207): View more from Maine

We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.

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(502): View more from Kentucky

im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.

(773): View more from Illinois

Stop texting me, I'm right here.

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(705): View more from Ontario

How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?

(1-705): View more from Ontario

I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"

(262): View more from Wisconsin

That was long passed due.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30

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(256): View more from Alabama

Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.

Fav 12 3714 1238
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(504): View more from Louisiana

Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.

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(816): View more from Missouri

OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM

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(704): View more from North Carolina

I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.

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