Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Randomize
