That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
The guy whose porn password I use finally renewed his membership. Lazy fucker had been slacking all summer.
I would ride that face into the sunset
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
Randomize
