Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(516): View more from New York

All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.

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(315): View more from New York

i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them

Fav 13 4340 1385
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?

(419): View more from Ohio

That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.

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(626): View more from California

I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?

(949): View more from California

OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.

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(604): View more from British Columbia

The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.

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(217): View more from Illinois

I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?

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(904): View more from Florida

I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee

Fav 18 979 1923
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(678): View more from Georgia

Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.

Fav 1 72 11
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(251): View more from Alabama

OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS

Fav 0 9 53
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