Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
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